The New (and Better!) Version of the Battle Hymn of the Republic

by Mark Twain, 1900

Mine eyes have seen the orgy of the launching of the Sword;
He is searching out the hoardings where the stranger's wealth is stored;
He hath loosed his fateful lightnings, and with woe and death has scored;
His lust is marching on.

I have seen him in the watch-fires of a hundred circling camps;
They have builded him an altar in the Eastern dews and damps;
I have read his doomful mission by the dim and flaring lamps--
His night is marching on.

I have read his bandit gospel writ in burnished rows of steel:
"As ye deal with my pretensions, so with you my wrath shall deal;
Let the faithless son of Freedom crush the patriot with his heel;
Lo, Greed is marching on!"

We have legalized the strumpet and are guarding her retreat;*
Greed is seeking out commercial souls before his judgement seat;
O, be swift, ye clods, to answer him! be jubilant my feet!
Our god is marching on!

In a sordid slime harmonious Greed was born in yonder ditch,
With a longing in his bosom--and for others' goods an itch.
As Christ died to make men holy, let men die to make us rich--
Our god is marching on. 

In other words...

Imperialistic conquering is the "faithless son of Freedom," it is the very "Greed" which marches on and crushes its followers and victims alike!  Mark Twain makes an excellent point when he says "Greed is seekng out commercial souls."  It is clear that Imperialisim is driven not by a desire to help others but by economic forces.  America is propelled forward to conquer new lands GREED.  And yet, lamentably, we have legalized Imperialism, made it acceptable, and even gotten some to belive we do it for the benefit of others.  The plain truth is that greed is our god, and in Greed we trust.