Theme Song Essay
Explain how a particular song serves as your theme song
|
|
|
Exceeds
Beats by Dre
97 pts
|
Meets
Earbuds by Apple
85 pts
|
Partially Meets
Headphones by Coby
65 pts
|
Not Yet
Tin Cans by Del Monte
50 pts
|
Hook Introduction
To what extent does the intro feature an interesting, engaging lead that draws the reader to a powerful thesis (WRITING)
|
I love how the introduction draws the reader in through an engaging use of style, language and/or content. I am looking forward to seeing where this leads me.
|
I like how your introduction draws the reader in to your big idea. What would happen if you experimented with your introduction in a way you've never tried before?
|
What would happen if your introduction was less generalized? How might you get away from the cliche introductions that get used so often?
|
What's up? It seems like you are struggling with the start of your essay here. I'm not entirely sure I know where this is headed as a reader and that concerns me. What might I do to help?
|
Thesis Statement
To what extent do you present a powerful, assertive, defensible thesis (WRITING)
|
I love how your thesis relates a powerful, assertive, defensible position. Your language conveys personal style as well. I am looking forward to reading this thing.
|
I like how your thesis relates a defensible position that focuses on an enduring idea. I can imagine what your essay is going to bring the reader.
|
What would happen if your thesis statement was more assertive? How might you better suggest where your essay is going through specifics in your thesis statement?
|
What's up? It seems like your thesis statement hasn't grown since the workshop. Why do you think that is? What do you usually do when you get stuck? How well did that work this time?
|
Body Paragraphs
To what extent do the body paragraphs feature rich, meaningful, well-organized, show-rather-than-tell details? (WRITING)
|
I am loving how you prove your thesis with unique, insightful and engaging details in a crazy well-organized manner. You are showing rather than telling consistently.
|
I am like how you prove your thesis with meaningful, specific details in a well-organized manner. You are showing more often than telling. Everything feels neat and tidy.
|
What would happen if you reorganized some of your ideas? How might you better show rather than tell? What specifics could you include here?
|
What's up? I'm not seeing much detail and what is here feels very disorganized. How can I help you get this thing kicking into gear? Bad night at the keyboard or something more going on?
|
Conclusion
To what extent does the essay lead to a logical "so what?" conclusion that leaves the reader thinking? (WRITING)
|
I love how your conclusion brings it back to the core ideas of the thesis statement and concludes with a powerful, unique, insightful idea that leaves your reader thinking.
|
I like how your conclusion revisits core ideas of your thesis statement and leaves the reader thinking. How might your language help take your conclusion to the next level?
|
I'm concerned that your conclusion focuses on the texts rather than your big ideas. It just seems to end without coming to a bigger point. How can you leave the reader thinking?
|
What's up? A conclusion should conclude and so far, your conclusion is just the last paragraph. How can I help you leave the reader thinking?
|
Voice
To what extent does the paper feature an engaging, invested and consistent personality behind the writing (WRITING)
|
I love how your personality flows throughout your writing; a unique, authentic and insightful style that helps give your ideas even more weight.
|
I like that your personality emerges in moments of your writing; it helps give your ideas even more weight.
|
I'm concerned that I don't get a sense of you coming through your writing. It also feels a bit disingenuous. How can you build authenticity in your work? How can your language reflect your personality and thinking?
|
What's up? It feels a bit like a heartless, soulless robot spit out this piece of writing. How can I help you infuse your writing with a greater sense of personality?
|
MUGS
To what extent does the paper feature proper grammar, spelling, usage and such. (MUGS)
|
I love how rich and powerful your use of language is. You clearly have command of your mechanics et al and use them in the service of your style.
|
I like how well you use your language. When I notice errors they do not interfere at all. How might you improve your MUGS so that you may develop a stronger personal style?
|
I'm concerned with how many errors showed up in your language (I may also be concerned that your writing was too short to be assessed this way.) What tools/resources could help you with proofreading and editing?
|
What's up? It seems like you failed to proofread at all. How might I help you get your MUGS on track?
|
Thinking & Writing Process
|
I love how varied, plentiful, useful the evidence demonstrating the process of your thinking and product development appears to be.
|
I like the evidence I'm seeing that demonstrates the process of your thinking and product development for this piece.
|
I'm underwhelmed by the evidence you have provided. What else could you include to show your thinking process & development?
|
What's up? Why does it seem to be challenging to track your progress? What can I do to make it a little easier?
|
|
|
I love that you turned it in on time or even early. Boomshakala.
|
I like that you turned it in before it was a full day late. It happens. Life goes on.
|
Turned in up to 1 week late. How can I help? What might you do to prevent this from happening next time?
|
Turned in later than 2 weeks. What's up?
|